The past few days were full of long hours at the library, late nights at the office, post-finals celebrations, dog walks, rollerblading, dancing, cackling, and even a date.
My goodness. How exhausting.
That second picture is of Jack and his crush, Jared McDreamy. Look at those cheesy smiles. Sigh.
Pissed 3L: “No other institution could get away with this. This is ridiculous. No other for-profit business could provide such shitty service for what they charge. Nothing works. The wireless doesn’t work. The printers don’t work. The staplers don’t work. Nothing fucking works in this entire school.”
I thought about that quote the next day while printing my Advanced Estate Planning exam.
I printed my exam from the computer lab because on Sunday I wasted an entire hour trying to print my international tax law outline from my laptop and I did not have the energy to go through that ordeal again.
I was also bleeding during my exam. That morning the dogs and I got caught in a rain storm during our morning walk. The rottweiler tripped me as we ran back home and I kissed some concrete. I noticed that my jeans were covered in blood when I got in my car to go to school. The skin of my knee was scraped off, but luckily I have a ton of first-aid supplies left over from 1L year.
So there I am, in the computer lab, printing while ignoring the throbbing pain of my knee, and of course there are no staples. BAH HUMBUG.
An empty stapler during the school year is a slight inconvenience, but an empty stapler during finals is worse than leggings. Well, maybe not…
At least it’s over.
Tomorrow I am going to the office for a few hours and then heading to a cafe to read a novel. Non-law students may not appreciate how glorious that is, but it trust me. It’s amazing.
I spent the majority of yesterday popping pseudoephedrine pills1 at Wilde Roast while finishing the final draft of my Moot Court brief. I felt really sick, but this “awful” had to be finished. If Webster’s dictionary had an illustration for the word “tedious” it would look like this:
I think the hypo for the moot court brief is boring and the procedural posture is awkward: an interlocutory appeal of a denial to suppress a subpoena.
Um.
Yeah.
Exactly.
I have completed four oral arguments on this brief, and my last one is this coming week. Although my brief could be better utilized as a weapon to beat skinny-pants-wearers, I am so overjoyed to finish with Moot Court.
I spent some time this week watching real court proceedings in Anoka, which are vastly more interesting than things in the State of Moot.
Watching real lawyers argue also gives me a new appreciation for how important oral arguments are and how easy Moot Court is. If a lawyer can – with a straight face – ask a judge for leniency for a defendant who had a 2.9 BAC when he terrorized his wife with a gun, then I can slap on a tie, waltz in front of my legal writing professors, and advocate for some make-believe Moot Court clients.
Unlike the raging husband, the Moot Court clients aren’t standing next to me. There’s no sobbing wife, angry mother, or threat of jail time. The lack of stakes makes Moot Court feel like a very charmed exercise. And yes, I just said that.
1Tylenol Severe Congestion. But I’ll let you know when I start using illicit drugs.
This semester I took 17 credits (5 classes + moot court), worked 20 hours a week, and had a social life. Oh, and the dog, of course. I might be superman… or a time-shifter.
It is 8pm. My Conflicts exam is in 12 hours. I feel tired, cranky, and ridiculous.
I haven’t seen my boyfriend in two weeks. He said he was going to come over tonight, but watched a movie with his roommate instead. These are busy times – they live together and haven’t seen each other in a week.
The cream in my coffee tastes off. I look at the “use by” date and it says November 15th. It is December 20th. Epic fail.
Then the dog farts. It smells like rotten mouse.
So I am sitting there – tired, lonely, with undrinkable coffee and unbreathable air. This is not going to work.
I take the dog on a walk. It isn’t so terribly cold, and the air is breathable.
When I come back to the apartment the air is safe again. I dump the coffee and creamer., and pour a fresh cup.
I then sit down, retool the outline, and get it done. 2 more exams and I’m done!
After the shock that was employment law, I engaged in a bit over-study for today’s Real Estate law exam.
So I dragged a bloated, coffee-stained outline into the exam room. It felt like carrying a bible with tabbies.1
The outline had two major chunks. I am a firm believer that every 100 pages of substantive outline needs to be covered with at least one irreverent picture. My outline was about 200 pages, so I got two pictures.
The second table of contents had a picture of my favorite lolcat: chastity kitty.
As paper was flying during the exam I kept coming across the pictures of Amanda Lepore and Chastity Kitty, and I snickered each time. Best exam ever.2
1 Although it was determined yesterday that beating the exam with my outline while screaming “I’M FILLED WITH MORTGAGE LOVE!” would probably be disruptive and possibly be against the honor code.
2 The real estate law exam was elegant. It was only four pages! I think the one-question tort exam last year was at least 10 pages. And that’s not even an exaggeration! I walked in the snow, uphill, both ways for a single question 10 page exam! Oh those were the days…
