This is Harley shortly before I bludgeoned him to death:

Harley is taller than my coffee table. This is a problem because that means his tail is about the height of the large glass of coffee that was right next to my overpriced laptop….

Fail.

Unfortunately, I have plans with Broby to watch Splice, so I don’t have time to slaughter the dog…

Broby and I arrive at Mall of America to find out that the movie theater’s website was wrong and that the movie is at 12:30am and not 11:45pm. We use the extra time to check out Cantina #1, which is the Corona restaurant in Mall of America that randomly turns into a Latin club at night.

I loved it! We listened to bachata, saw beautiful (and no-so-beautiful) girls in spiked heels and flat-ironed hair, and even got a taste of Reggaeton. It was like Azucar came to Minneapolis.

Splice was alright, but I could have lived without the monster-sex scenes. After watching epic movies like Avatar and Sex and the City II, Splice felt like a TV show…with a monster-sex scene...

One of the coolest parts of the night was the view of the mall after the movie at 2am:

The electric bill must be unreal…

The computer wouldn’t turn on this morning so I took it to the store for repair. I find out in 2-3 weeks if I need to kill the bullmastiff. It will be a fun BBQ. I’ll bring the fava beans and a nice chianti.