This morning around 5:30am, someone started shoveling. The grating of metal on concrete sounds like nails-on-chalkboard plus a pinch of hell.

I shook my fist and tried to go back to bed. Bah!

Luckily that was the worst part of my day. I [...]]]> My bed is by the window, and I need to rethink that…

This morning around 5:30am, someone started shoveling. The grating of metal on concrete sounds like nails-on-chalkboard plus a pinch of hell.

I shook my fist and tried to go back to bed. Bah!

Luckily that was the worst part of my day. I got up 30 minutes later, made a comfort-food breakfast (pancakes, eggs, toast, green tea…) and then went to school for my final the: 8-hour “take home” Contracts exam.

Now, an 8-hour exam isn’t as bad as you might think. It felt more like having 8 hours to write a paper that I’ve already researched.

I arrive at school shortly after 8am, pick up my exam, and then scoot off to a library outside the law school.

I did my exam surrounded by intense, nerdy, scary, industrious undergrads. Around 3pm I skipped back to the law school, hit print, and handed in my exam. Contracts Crisis* Solved! (mimicking Paris).

Very few people actually take the “take home” exams home. Because what happens? Car accidents happen

Girl in hallway: “Yeah, so this morning someone almost rear ended me! Some hard honking stopped that… But then when I got onto the highway the two people in front of me spun out… god that’s my worst nightmare: missing an exam because I got in a wreck!”

Indeed. That whole getting maimed business is completely secondary concern when you’re in law school…

Plus, depending on how far you live, you’re going to lose an hour in commuting… not worth it.

So I have one exam down, and three more to go! Next is Thursday’s 8-hour Conlaw exam. Vöt!

Our Conlaw professor is holding a Q&A session for us in a few hours, so I haven’t gone home yet. I’m at Starbucks reading about the scandal of the day, and then reviewing the Conlaw outline…

********Update
Okay, I may have understated the situation when I said scandal. I’m at Starbucks literally gasping,…oh my goodness! Blagojevich royally fucked up. And you know Michelle Malkin is on the case…

*******Update #2
The official complaint is available here via the Dept. of Justice homepage…

*contracts wasn’t really a crisis…it was absolutely painless.

Lexis has a very liberal point system. You get points for researching, tutorials, and 400 points-a-pop for those goofy searches that the Lexis rep emails.

Lexis will give you a $5 Starbucks gift card for 400 points, and a $10 gift card for 715 points.

I’ve received five [...]]]> LexisNexis is pretty much a big deal.*

Lexis has a very liberal point system. You get points for researching, tutorials, and 400 points-a-pop for those goofy searches that the Lexis rep emails.

Lexis will give you a $5 Starbucks gift card for 400 points, and a $10 gift card for 715 points.

I’ve received five $10 gift cards so far.

That’s right. $50 in coffee. Thank you mam.

Today I’m studying for my contracts final at Starbucks, courtesy of Lexis. I hand the gift card to the chipper Barista and she asks, “Haveya registered your card yet?”

Me: (mumbling) “no… I haven’t… it’s only for $10 so…”
Barista: “Well! If ya register it you get free refills dontcha know! That’ll be 54 cents, oh, wait! Someone registered it for you. Your refills are free! Here-ya-go dontcha know!”

Holler Lexis. Holler.

Despite Lexis’s bribes, I still do most of my research on Westlaw because I’ve learned Westlaw’s shorthand for restatements… for example, “Rest 2d Contr 90” will pull up “Restatement (Second) of Contracts § 90: Promise Reasonably Inducing Action Or Forbearance.” I’m sure Lexis has a similar shorthand… I just haven’t bothered to learn it yet.

Westlaw also has a point system, but doesn’t offer gift cards. And uh, everything I’ve seen on Westlaw Rewards costs about 10,000 more points than I have. Maybe I’ll get a highlighter someday…

* No, I’m not a student rep, nor am I being paid for this.

Update **********
Apparently the coffee is so delicious that I feel the need to pour it all over myself. Wee! ITS SO WARM! (but not scalding) I’m not getting up for a while…

Update #2 **********
The fun continues on facebook…

Professor C: “You can expect that my exam will take you 8 hours to do. Some 8 hour exams are like 2 hour exams that you have 8 hours to do, but my 8 hour exam is for 8 hours.” (Nervous chuckles from the class) Jill (loudly): “Gee Thanks!”

Professor C couldn’t resist taking a swipe at Palin…

Professor C: “So we have Salmon fishermen here. And this takes place in Alaska, which we know is close to Russia…”

Professor C: “Jack, what test does the court use?”

Jack: “Uh… restatement § 261, “Discharge By Supervening Impracticability” it says “Where, after a contract is made….” (starts reading it)

Professor C: (cutting Jack off) Okay, we get it. It’s on the page. So what part of the test isn’t satisfied?”

Jack: “Uh, what [...]]]> Poor Jack…

Professor C: “Jack, what test does the court use?”

Jack: “Uh… restatement § 261, “Discharge By Supervening Impracticability” it says “Where, after a contract is made….” (starts reading it)

Professor C: (cutting Jack off) Okay, we get it. It’s on the page. So what part of the test isn’t satisfied?”

Jack: “Uh, what test are we talking about?”

Professor C: “JACK! YOU JUST READ THE TEST FOR US!”

(Class laughs)

Jack: “Oh, when I get called on I can’t even think…”

Mr. and Mrs. Pickles purchased an apartment complex and received a nasty surprise:

“Five or six days [after signing the contract], when the Pickleses went to introduce themselves to the tenants, they discovered raw sewage [...]]]> We had an unsavory case in contracts today. Lenawee County Bd. of Health v. Messerly, 417 Mich. 17 (Mich. 1982)

Mr. and Mrs. Pickles purchased an apartment complex and received a nasty surprise:

“Five or six days [after signing the contract], when the Pickleses went to introduce themselves to the tenants, they discovered raw sewage seeping out of the ground.”

Of course the apartment building is condemned by the county, the cost of fixing the defective sewage tank is prohibitive, and the court doesn’t rescind the contract.

Basically, the Pickles were screwed.

And our professor went there:

Professor C: “So we have a couple named the Pickles, and they find themselves in a pickle! Hah! I’ve been waiting ALL SEMESTER to tell that joke…”

Indeed.

In the decision the court mentions then discards the Barren Cow case. Complicated legal analysis? Not really…

Professor C: “The courts problem with the historical analysis is that it DOESN’T MAKE SENSE!”

I just imagine Mrs. Pickles with big Winehouse-beehive hairdo, all excited to meet her new tenants, stepping into the soggy, smelly grass…

Professor C: “So, Daniel…” Dan: “Oh, you can call me Dan. The only people who call me Daniel are my parents. Or you can call me JD-Baby.” Professor C: “What? What did you say? JD…baby?” Dan: “Yeah, you can call me either Dan or JD-Baby.” Professor C: “Do you actually [...]]]> I’m so horribly amused…

Professor C: “So, Daniel…”
Dan: “Oh, you can call me Dan. The only people who call me Daniel are my parents. Or you can call me JD-Baby.”
Professor C: “What? What did you say? JD…baby?”
Dan: “Yeah, you can call me either Dan or JD-Baby.”
Professor C: “Do you actually expect me to call you that?”
Dan: “I’m just giving you options.”

Professor C: “Okay, Jill! I’m the court. You’re my clerk. Tell me what to do.” Jill: “First off, pay me more money.”

Wood* can just stay at home!

Professor C: “The plaintiff doesn’t have to go out and market Lady Duff-Gordon’s designs. He can just sit at home, watch Project Runway, [...]]]> Jill gets paid.

Professor C: “Okay, Jill! I’m the court. You’re my clerk. Tell me what to do.”
Jill: “First off, pay me more money.”

Wood* can just stay at home!

Professor C: “The plaintiff doesn’t have to go out and market Lady Duff-Gordon’s designs. He can just sit at home, watch Project Runway, and eat Bon-Bons.”

Professor C: “So, Sarah…can the plaintiff sit at home, watch Project Runway, and eat Bon-Bons on his couch?”

* Refers to Otis F. Wood in Wood v. Lucy, Lady Duff-Gordon, 222 N.Y. 88, 118 N.E. 214

I realize this may mean that I’m officially a legal nerd, but this sentence in my textbook brought me so much joy:

“Off-the-rack” terms, like ready-made suits, are less costly than custom-tailored ones.

Professor C: “When you sign a contract you should read the damn thing.”

Professor C: “Why is it in capitals? That’s the insurer’s way of getting around the reasonable expectation policy. They’ll say, “What do you mean you didn’t know?! It’s in CAPITALS!” but of course the problem is that half the [...]]]> On Contracts:

Professor C: “When you sign a contract you should read the damn thing.”

Professor C: “Why is it in capitals? That’s the insurer’s way of getting around the reasonable expectation policy. They’ll say, “What do you mean you didn’t know?! It’s in CAPITALS!” but of course the problem is that half the freakin’ document is in capitals…“

Professor T’s world:

Professor T: “Up where I live there are guns going off all the time. I have to put an orange vest on my dog when I let him out in the morning because hunters will shoot at anything that moves...”