Dennis Jansen - The Official Website » facebook

My mother does not have a mullet.

Jansen — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 04:55:51 +0000

This is why I love being facebook friends with my mother:

Horrified that she was mistaken for “grimy mullet lady at bar”, my mother then posted a picture of herself on my wall to show that she does not, in fact, have a mullet:

Work, dating, discretion.

Jansen — Wed, 26 May 2010 05:25:00 +0000

I need a FAQ page on this blog. I usually respond to questions via twitter, but my new readers keep asking the same question: “Why don’t you write more about dating or work?”

My answer: discretion. This blog is fun, but not sloppy.

Contrary to popular belief, there is a filter here…well, sort of. One trick I learned as a resident assistant in undergrad is that clean living is the simplest way to avoid projecting dirt, so I try not to do anything that I would have a problem with broadcasting on the world wide inter-web.¹

That means that there is less to filter, which my life easier, because filter refills are expensive…

I also like my job, and want to stay at my company after graduation, so I wouldn’t compromise that for a push in the google rankings or a few extra comments.

What I love about working for my company is that it is a collaborative atmosphere, so the daily annoyances that make Bitter Lawyer and Namby Pamby so interesting are not part of my world. I go to work, interact with hilarious co-workers, and do my job.

Sure, there are some shocking cases…but I just don’t have to deal with any craziness beyond battling for parking near the building.

The point is that I don’t write about work because I am professional and there is not a lot to write about.

Dating is another story. I blame that mess on facebook.

Googling and facebook-friending a potential date is essential due diligence. Trust me. Someone can seem completely innocent and charming but then google reveals a video of them doing ungodly things with their dog² or other deal-breaking craziness.

I need to know about the CooCooCaChoo in advance! So I screen…

The problem with this due diligence is that now a pack of my facebook “friends” are trolling for dates.

Also, to compound the awkwardness, facebook’s “friend suggestion” feature has turned facebook into the newest dating site:

That’s how I met Judd. Facebook said we had a ton of friends in common, so I just hit “add” without thinking about it. Judd then messaged me, “Hi, you’re cute. We should go on a date!” I agreed to go on the date, we clicked, became boyfriends, …and then he moved to New York. Hm.

But Judd, like all of my other ex-boyfriends is still my facebook friend and we still keep in contact. So anything that the new “friend suggestion” guys write on my wall is visible to him, my other Exes, past dates, potential dates, and mom. Sigh.

But that is a minor drawback because the benefits of screening guys on facebook outweigh the awkwardness by far. If the suggestion-friends are completely lewd then I unadd them, but that rarely happens because the vast majority of these guys still fall into the same three categories:

Bedingfields: Over-enthusiastic, “Hi! Nice to meet you. I love your eyes! We should totally get married. What’s your name again? ”
E-Ballers: Fills up my facebook and text inbox, but acts completely bored when we hang out. Am I talking to your secretary online?
Fair-Weathers: Completely enraptured in-person but takes a week to respond to a facebook or text message. Might need to borrow the E-Baller’s secretary.

(Note how none of the categories involves crass.)

I went on a lot of dates in the past few weeks, and some were pretty outrageous. But because my dates are aware of this blog through facebook, I can’t write about any of the dates because broadcasting a terrible date to the entire Minneapolis gay community³ is just tacky. Besides, my BFF and I would have nothing to dish about when we hang out.

So I don’t write a lot about work because I am professional and I don’t write a lot about dates because I am classy, (and don’t want to get cut.) Hopefully that explains things!

¹ Remember, my personal motto is “I have a good disposition” and I mean it.
² Yes, that actually happened. I was mortified.
³ Lot of facebook friends… have the entire community covered through at least one person.

If you have any questions to add to my forth-coming FAQ page please send them to @dennisjansen.

Why I hate being a single gay man on facebook.

Jansen — Mon, 17 May 2010 22:41:17 +0000

Everytime I sign into facebook I see a combination of the same trashy ads.

At least they are organized from scrawny to beefy?

Do single straight people get the same hooch-tastic ads?

Not Quite Overshare: Foursquare, Twitter, and Facebook

Jansen — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 23:33:36 +0000

Explaining social media tools to someone who doesn’t use them is always awkward, but I’ll try anyway.

I use social media tools to make my life easier. This is how that works:

The blog:

Getting connected: The blog is a quick and easy way to introduce myself to peers, coworkers, others in the Twin Cities, and worldwide.
Staying connected: The blog allows friends and family to catch up on my life on their time. It is less jarring and harassing than a phone call or the pain of “scheduling coffee” with people who I don’t see as often. The blog also cuts the mundane, preliminary “what’s going on with you lately?” portion of conversations and allows us to jump into deeper topics…sort of like doing the reading before class.
A resource: Blogs are the new autobiographies and how-to books. I had very few surprises during my first year of law school because I read law school student blogs (such as this one, this one, and this one) and their advice was far more valuable than any “how to” book on law school that I wasted my money on. The experiences I write about help others considering going to law school, becoming a resident assistant, dog owner, blog author, etc.
PR & Journaling: The blog allows me to chronicle my experience and curtail rumors about major events by allowing people to read my account of a situation and form their own opinion. It’s like a constant interactive press conference, minus the vicious reporters and “oh shit” looks.

Twitter: Twitter lets me instantly connect with friends, professionals, and others. Twitter is less harassing and time consuming than an IM conversation, and a great way to meet new people, especially other law students and lawyers.

There is a lot of noise on twitter that I don’t subscribe to. I don’t follow people who only retweet news stories, stock prices, quotes, or “deals” that no one cares about. It’s like subscribing to junk mail. And to that I say, “Bitch, boo, bye.”

Twitter, is not (for me at least) a popularity contest to find the most followers. The important part about twitter is connecting with real people. And if I also happen to get a coupon from a local pizza place then that’s just an amazing bonus…

Foursquare: The ultimate way to connect with locals. Foursquare uses my phone’s GPS to locate me and attaches that location to my tweets.

Foursquare also tells me who else is at my location and has allowed me to connect with coworkers and neighbors who I would otherwise not have met. There has been a recent stink over privacy concerns, but it’s simple to give the address of a nearby park or public place when you’re at a friend’s house or at home.

If someone was really going to rob you or stalk you, they would (and could) do it without the assistance of Foursquare. This is why the new Taser X3 is super affordable and comes in cute “fashion colors.”

Facebook: Where it all comes together. Chances are that you are reading this post on facebook, or have become my facebook friend after running into me on Foursquare or Twitter.

My facebook account is constantly updated with posts from my blog, Foursquare, and Twitter. This is incredibly convenient because people just have to look at my facebook page to see where I am, and what I’m up to.

Giving my friends this information makes my life easier because my friends know when I am available. The running-updated schedule makes people more likely to respect my time and less likely to pester me when I’m busy. The updates are also conversation starters and invitations for my neighbors to join me at local cafes and bars if they are in the area.

My social media connectivity never feels like a “big brother” or exhibitionist situation because all of these applications require an affirmative action to update. This makes a true, unintended, overshare uncommon. Which is why you won’t know if I’m constipated at a rat-infested 7-Eleven restroom unless I post it (which I won’t, don’t worry.)

My life is made easier by sharing more information rather than less. I got used to living in the proverbial fishbowl as a resident assistant in undergrad, and living in the fishbowl is rather comfortable.

I share what I want to, and I find that perpetual connection with others is far better to being out of the loop.

Facebook fail

Jansen — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 04:07:34 +0000

The highlight of my evening was that facebook allowed the registeration of username shortcuts at 11pm.

So of course “Jansen” was taken by some Asian dude.¹ And for whatever reason “Dennis” was unavailable, but you can catch me at http://www.facebook.com/dennisjansen. Original. I know.

Add me, eat, and be merry.

¹ “Jansen” is a common Asian first-name. Don’t ask me why.

Best Week Ever #10 & 11: Big Fun.

Jansen — Sun, 05 Apr 2009 09:07:41 +0000

I spent the past two weeks toting around my big-honking golf umbrella, printing out offensive amounts of paper in the library, and screaming along to “Big Fun” in my car.

Week #10 was a lopsided week because my Thursday-Friday class was moved to Tuesday and Wednesday. This meant that on that Wednesday I had all of my classes¹ including legal writing.

For Wednesday, we had abnormally large reading assignments for CivPro and Corporations, and of course, that was the day that spring briefs were due.

So most of the class spoke in grunts and scowled at anyone who was insufferably cheery. Grr.²

I was up most of Tuesday evening and went to bed immediately after school on Wednesday. I pretty sure I flew home. I slept for about 15 hours. It was amazing. I smile every time I think about it.

I spent Thursday, Friday, and Saturday at work, making up hours that I didn’t put in at the beginning of the week.

That weekend Stella and I went to the 90’s and watched the drag shows. Nina D’Angelo came out in a fat suit and gave a Cher performance. Stella and I were seated in the audience. Obese Cher got off the stage and sat on our laps. Yes, it was a hot mess. And yes, there’s video footage.

When Stella and I got home we saw that some of our housemates had trashed the living room and kitchen:

We were NOT amused.³ Lets forget that happened. Ugh.

Week #11 started with my first oral argument. My opponent and I had the same concept of the assignment, so there was no bloodletting or surprises. It was a fun experience, although I somehow managed to wear a blue-black suit top with my very-black slacks. This is how I get my reputation for keeping it classy…⁴

Last Monday’s oral argument was our “practice” argument. The real one is next week, and my suit will match. I promise.

This past week was somewhat unproductive because I violated the sanctity of my sleep schedule. If I miss even a few hours of sleep, I get into a zombie-like state after 5pm. Lack of sleep is a self-perpetuating thing because when I am tired I am more likely to stay up unnecessarily instead of going to bed…which means I’m tired the next day and…yeah.

I reconciled with my bed this weekend. A full 8-hours is non-negotiable for the next few weeks.

No.634 received some humble buzz during the last two weeks:

There’s a No.634 facebook group. (Fancy!) I will post a lot of content there first.
I’m somehow the #9 law school tweeter.
There’s a collection of my ramblings interview over at Law Bound.

¹ 8am – Legal Writing, 9am Civpro, 11am Corps, 1:25 Crimlaw, 2:20 Property. 4pm – a comfort McFlurry then bed time.

²Crabby to put it mildly. Half of us couldn’t make eye contact with the obnoxious guy from Crimlaw. I’m surprised that no one raised their hand and ask for a gag order: “CAN WE JUST HAVE HIM NOT TALK FOR ONE CLASS PERIOD?”

³ The mess wasn’t completely cleaned up for a few days. This was the topic of much griping around the house. It was an interesting social study too. Turns out that mostly the minorities and women in the house were pissed off about it. Some of us noted that…

⁴ If that wasn’t bad enough, the suit jacket and pants had two different types of pinstripes! My room wasn’t well lit enough for me to catch the mistake before I got to school. (Yes. I literally got dressed in the dark…)It was one of those fashion mistakes that wasn’t glaring, but really irks everyone who notices it. But given how many students have no concept of appropriate formal wear, it wasn’t a big deal.

⁴ Yes, I know I just said “when I’m tired, I stay up.” That may sound stupid, but it’s true. I stay up so late because I’m vegging in front of a computer or book…

Boo Facebook

Jansen — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 21:36:19 +0000

I’m not sure if facebook chat is sucking, or if it’s the school internet…

Facebook = news service?

Jansen — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 03:32:04 +0000

It looks like facebook has just become a news service. There’s a public photo album* of a UN school bombed by Israelis.

Here is a video via Al Jazeera.

* Warning there are some pictures of dead school children.

On Twitter, Tumblr, and Microblogging

Jansen — Sat, 13 Dec 2008 15:56:47 +0000

Most people at my law school have facebook. Very few law students use twitter, tumblr, or a maintain a blog.

I’ve tried to explain twitter to other law students and they think it’s absurd. But now I have the New York Times on my side. Think of Twitter as Facebook status updates taken to the next level:

In essence, Facebook users didn’t think they wanted constant, up-to-the-minute updates on what other people are doing. Yet when they experienced this sort of omnipresent knowledge, they found it intriguing and addictive. Why?

Social scientists have a name for this sort of incessant online contact. They call it “ambient awareness.” It is, they say, very much like being physically near someone and picking up on his mood through the little things he does — body language, sighs, stray comments — out of the corner of your eye. Facebook is no longer alone in offering this sort of interaction online. In the last year, there has been a boom in tools for “microblogging”: posting frequent tiny updates on what you’re doing.

The phenomenon is quite different from what we normally think of as blogging, because a blog post is usually a written piece, sometimes quite long: a statement of opinion, a story, an analysis. But these new updates are something different. They’re far shorter, far more frequent and less carefully considered. One of the most popular new tools is Twitter, a Web site and messaging service that allows its two-million-plus users to broadcast to their friends haiku-length updates — limited to 140 characters, as brief as a mobile-phone text message — on what they’re doing.

It’s all about the aggregate:

This is the paradox of ambient awareness. Each little update — each individual bit of social information — is insignificant on its own, even supremely mundane. But taken together, over time, the little snippets coalesce into a surprisingly sophisticated portrait of your friends’ and family members’ lives, like thousands of dots making a pointillist painting. This was never before possible, because in the real world, no friend would bother to call you up and detail the sandwiches she was eating. The ambient information becomes like “a type of E.S.P.,” as Haley described it to me, an invisible dimension floating over everyday life.

And this has definitely happened before:

“It’s like I can distantly read everyone’s mind,” Haley went on to say. “I love that. I feel like I’m getting to something raw about my friends. It’s like I’ve got this heads-up display for them.” It can also lead to more real-life contact, because when one member of Haley’s group decides to go out to a bar or see a band and Twitters about his plans, the others see it, and some decide to drop by — ad hoc, self-organizing socializing. And when they do socialize face to face, it feels oddly as if they’ve never actually been apart. They don’t need to ask, “So, what have you been up to?” because they already know. Instead, they’ll begin discussing something that one of the friends Twittered that afternoon, as if picking up a conversation in the middle.

The important part is that microblogging is something you have to experience to get:

Yet it is also why it can be extremely hard to understand the phenomenon until you’ve experienced it. Merely looking at a stranger’s Twitter or Facebook feed isn’t interesting, because it seems like blather. Follow it for a day, though, and it begins to feel like a short story; follow it for a month, and it’s a novel.

There are, of course, downsides to microblogging like the “recent ex” drammy… only available online:

Worse, Ahan was also confronting a common plague of Facebook: the recent ex. She had broken up with her boyfriend not long ago, but she hadn’t “unfriended” him, because that felt too extreme. But soon he paired up with another young woman, and the new couple began having public conversations on Ahan’s ex-boyfriend’s page. One day, she noticed with alarm that the new girlfriend was quoting material Ahan had e-mailed privately to her boyfriend; she suspected he had been sharing the e-mail with his new girlfriend. It is the sort of weirdly subtle mind game that becomes possible via Facebook, and it drove Ahan nuts.

This is a follow-up to the blogging and casual acquaintances post in a way. It’s sort of strange when people who don’t blog or twitter religiously follow my twitter feed (usually via facebook because the rss feeds are linked to my status updates and note tools).

I’ve been mistaken for a Dutch Con-Artist… and had my Twitter posts used to (almost) get me into trouble at work…

It’s the flip side of the small-town feel of microblogging: everyone is up in your kool-aid:

This is the ultimate effect of the new awareness: It brings back the dynamics of small-town life, where everybody knows your business. Young people at college are the ones to experience this most viscerally, because, with more than 90 percent of their peers using Facebook, it is especially difficult for them to opt out.

“It’s just like living in a village, where it’s actually hard to lie because everybody knows the truth already,” Tufekci said. “The current generation is never unconnected. They’re never losing touch with their friends. So we’re going back to a more normal place, historically. If you look at human history, the idea that you would drift through life, going from new relation to new relation, that’s very new. It’s just the 20th century.”

But the ultimate purpose to all of the blogging and micro-blogging, (besides “keeping in touch”) is the self awareness benefit:

It is easy to become unsettled by privacy-eroding aspects of awareness tools. But there is another — quite different — result of all this incessant updating: a culture of people who know much more about themselves. Many of the avid Twitterers, Flickrers and Facebook users I interviewed described an unexpected side-effect of constant self-disclosure. The act of stopping several times a day to observe what you’re feeling or thinking can become, after weeks and weeks, a sort of philosophical act.

Laura Fitton, the social-media consultant, argues that her constant status updating has made her “a happier person, a calmer person” because the process of, say, describing a horrid morning at work forces her to look at it objectively. “It drags you out of your own head,” she added. In an age of awareness, perhaps the person you see most clearly is yourself.

Fall Photo Dump!

Jansen — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 02:01:08 +0000

There’s snow on the ground. That means that my fall pictures are no longer current, so I threw all of the semester’s left over pictures on facebook.

FB-Friends: sorry for clogging your newsfeed, but seriously, you should expect that from me by now…blame RSS.

For those of you who aren’t my facebook friends, here are some of the galleries:

University of Minnesota! Full set is here

Minneapolis IV. Full set is here

Other Minneapolis sets:

Minnesota Winter pictures! ..the new set is here