Dahlings!

Grasshoppers!

My dear, sweet, bacon-scented, dahling 0Ls: calm down.

So this is what happens: Your type-A student gets accepted, picks a law school, and then proceeds to freak out and annoy everyone.

I did it too, but it’s obnoxious. So stop.

If you are going to UMN law school in the fall, just email me if you have questions. Plenty of your future classmates are already in contact. I’ll either answer your questions or put you into contact with someone who can.

If you’re starting at another school, look over the advice posts (here) and Wish I Would Have Known. And if you have any burning questions after that, tweet me, and I can check if I know anyone at your school that I can put you into contact with.

But dear 0Ls, one rule: do not make an ass of yourself before you start school.

I know you are bored and therefore stressing unnecessarily. I know you feel the urge to harrass anyone you can find at your school with petty requests and unreasonable demands. I understand. I sympathize. But stop. You’re being ignorant.

And let’s be clear: UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES is it ever okay to get bitchy with the staff of your future law school. Ever.

Do not get bitchy with admissions.

Do not get bitchy with the dean’s office.

Do not get bitchy with the book store staff.

And for god’s sake, do not sass the law librarian. Thanks.

You cannot puff out your chest and demand things in law school. This is not undergrad. Complaining is not the way to make friends and influence people at your new school. You’re just going to get flagged as a problem student and experience chafing.

The other day, Jill came across a 0L in the school bookstore who threw a tantrum because she could not get her books early. Orientation is a month away! Calm down. Read a book. Take a yoga class. Find Jesus. Do what you need to do, just don’t burn bridges before you’re an official student.

I know you are excited for law school, but you really need to do two things before school starts:

1. Trust your school. You don’t have your class schedule or reading lists for a reason.
2. Relax. A month from now you will wish that you spent August relaxing instead of wringing your hands. Orientation will come. The semester will start. Worrying about it won’t make it happen any faster.

If you really want a sneak peak at law school: read the archives, and check out the 1L posts here, here, here, and here…and on any of the sites listed on this blog.

And if in doubt, ask a student.

Yours in Beyonce.
– Jansen, Your Crusty 3L friend.